Grieving Dad Speaks Out Against Bullying
Brad Lewis is a father who posted a video online against bullying hours after he found out his son Jordan had committed suicide.
Jordan, 15, left behind a note saying he was terribly bullied at school and then shot himself with a shot gun.
Lewis spoke to "New Day's" Chris Cuomo about the harassment and said:
"I never thought my son would have to go through this. With the law that is supposed to be in place and the way the school is supposed to be handling things, you know, I thought that things were better."
Lewis said his son told him a month and a half before he was being picked on at school.
The father told his son to go to administrators at school to report the incidents, but the dad says he didn't know the extent of the bullying.
Jordan's mom called Lewis to tell him the boy had killed himself with her boyfriend's gun.
Lewis now advises other parents about bullying:
"I think what parents don't realize is that they need to get, they need to look at the little things, take everything that a kid is doing as an observation of what might be going on in their lives. But the schools need to quit turning a blind eye, and trying to sit there and shove things under the rug, cause I've had a lot of kids and parents post on Facebook and say that this has happened and they've had no results of getting it taken care of."
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Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy.Don't fear failure so much that you refuse to try new things. The sad summary of a life contains three descriptions: could have, might have, and should have and kids who witness bullying feel powerless and seldom intervene. However, kids who take action can have a powerful and positive effect on the situation.Forgiveness is the cleansing fire that burns away old regrets and resentments.No one deserves to feel worthless . Keep safe and be alert always no one deserve to be judge check this out at http://safekidzone.com/#!/page_home.
Teenager became insensitive of someones feeling they just love to make fun of other even if they gets hurt anyone. Sometime they often used the technology to extend their fun they don,t even know that they become a bad example of the society through this can even say words witch is never OK to hear or read either. Technology was created to be useful to us and not to pull someone down. i have a device that could really a big help against this cyber bullying an app. that could really make our life different.
http://www.safekidzone.com/ protection is on our hand now.
CJC – Just for your own knowledge, this happened in Southern Illinois. The unemployment rate is terrible in this area. There are very few fields in which to get a good job and make a decent living. DOC is one of those ways. We have a Governer who is more than happy to keep closing facilities in Southern Illinois, and thus decreasing further the job opportunities. 2 hours away is not that far away. I'm sure he questions himself every waking moment. But, the schools do deserve part of the blame. If you have never lived in a small town, you can't understand the "good ol' boy", and politics of what goes on in our schools. This could have happened at any school in our area, and if the bullies were of a certain family, or important members of sports teams, then heads turn the other way. And absolutely the bullies deserve a LOT of the blame for this, as do their parents. Had they been taught by anyone, teachers, parents or friends, that their actions were unacceptable and that their words have an impact on others, then maybe this would not have happened. The tongue is a sword. I'm not saying that I would have handled things the same way this man did. I would have been up in the face of every admiistrator at the school demanding answers at the first hint of problems, but it is not my place to second guess his actions.
I have lived in Carterville my entire life and just graduated a few years ago from this same high school. I always thought I was fortunate enough that I attended a school where bullying was never a problem, but apparently that isn't the case. The board sure does do a good job of shoving this stuff under the rug, like he says, if my very observant self wasn't able to see any problems. I guess I shouldn't have been so naive since they could've cared less about my sport, which I chose to represent them through by myself and quite well. All CHS really cares about is their test scores on the ACT and whether or not the could make AYP. And the next class was very much encouraged to get higher test scores than the class before them. Favorites are a HUGE problem at this school with the teachers and affects what clubs you get in to. My heart goes out to him in this very difficult time. No one should ever EVER be made to feel like they need to end their life. Everyone is precious and is living a great story. Hopefully this school gets it together soon and does a better job with their bullying education, which now that I think about it was almost non existent while I was attending. Right now, I am not "Proud to be a Lion" and as childish as it may sound, have removed it from my education of Facebook.
You did great today Brad. Your son is looking down on you from heaven with pride and love. Please don't pay any attention to people who try to place blame. They obviously have never been in a situation like yours and have nothing better to do than play armchair judge and jury. Stay strong, and know that you have MANY people on your side and whoa re helping to spread the word against bullying.
Thanks CJC for your courage to post your comments..Kids have been bullied forever...its wrong..the problem needs to be addressed, that's a given. However, at some point the parent/care giver, needs to take some responsibility. It is an easy route to blame the schools..law enforcement...etc. If you have been made aware your child is having emotional problems, you need to act immediately and aggressively. The Schools can only help if the have been made aware of the problem.Unless we make our schools into a prison like environment, situations such as these will occur. We rarely hear in the media of the suicides caused by problems/abuse in thet home, drug abuse, or teen romances and just teenage angst..
That being said...this man lost his son..its sad...I feel for him...and I hope this story inspires more parents to take a closer look whats going on with their kids.
Also having firearms available in the home was probably not the best idea.
Hey Upperhanded... can you be ANY more insensitive? Really? Are you seriously trying to place blame on Brad's shoulders? Maybe I misunderstood you and you were referring to the BULLY'S parents needing to "take some responsibility". I sure hope so because if you're blaming Brad, you've got a screw loose. Not only has the man just lost his son but then he has to get comments from ignorant people saying that he's partly to blame. Wow! And here's some education for you... MY daughter has been bullied for the past 2 years by the same girl for no apparent reason ans you know what the school says? They told my daughter that if she came into the office one more time complaining about the bullying that she would be "moved to a different school" AKA expelled. Of course, I get involved and take it to the sheriff's dept and THEY said "kids will be kids" and that they couldn't do anything more than "ask" the girl to stop harassing my daughter but anything beyond that, their hands were tied. WTF?!? And then people like you, who have probably never had to go through this kind of crap, go and say the things you said. So tell me, what am I as a parent of a bullied kid supposed to do when I live in a small town that is lily-white and the "good old boys" attitude is still alive and kicking, not only in the school system but in law enforcement? So, next time, before you start making ignorant comments like, " It is an easy route to blame the schools..law enforcement...etc. ", maybe you need to do your homework and see just how many kids ARE reporting it and the parents HAVE gone to the authorities but it's still tolerated and swept under the rug. And all the while, the school administrators are bragging about ow they have a "zero tolerance" policy regarding bullying. B.S., all it is is lip service.
Upperhanded and CJC are most correct... Getting on TV via news, talk shows, etc. will never solve any problems. Do you think the bullies are watching these thinking "man, I gotta change my ways"? NO! They are out bullying caring less about these stories. As Upperhanded and CJC stated, this all begins with parents; the bullies parents and the victims parents. The father mentioned the school brushing matters under the rug? Sorry man but you brushed it under the rug when your son courageously came to you with his problems and you just "didn't understand the extent".. Come on pal, you are so against bullying, your son comes to you about he himself being bullied and you brush it off your shoulder?! The last thing a young man wants to do is go to his Dad and break down that he is being bullied, it makes a young man feel weak and a coward. And why is that? Because parents like you blow it off making it seem as a nuisance to you. Further more, you live two hours from your son, which also made him feel as if he was a nuisance to you.
This is all kind of like the people on welfare and food stamps claiming "someone's got to do something for me! I need support! Someone needs to be held accountable!"... No sir, in life so many people play the victim and it's time for people to start taking responsibility. You should have been at the bullies parents house busting doors down (exaggeration) and making things happen!!! You should have had your son write a log of everytime he has been bullied in a notebook to bring to school faculty threatening legal action. You should have held your son at night and promised him that as his father things would change, AND MAKE THEM CHANGE!!!
In the United States we are blessed with wonderful school systems (for the very most part) and to blame a suicide on a school is like blaming 911 on airplanes.
Give the attention seeking air-time a break for a while, actually deal with your tragic loss and reevaluate every circumstance that lead up to this. Take accountability and quit attacking school systems, instead speak out to parents to BE INVOLVED, BE WITH their children, AND BE AT THAT SCHOOL EVERY SINGLE GOD GIVEN DAY UNTIL THE PROBLEM IS SOLVED.
I am just a 21 year old college student who believes in God, morals, ethics and being realistic about life. Sorry if this seems uncalled for, rude or unthoughtful but folks it's time to quit with all the sorrow and start changing things!!!
QUIT PLAYING THE VICTIM FOLKS! TAKE RESPONSIBILITY
May Jordan rest in Heaven and in peace, may his family and friends find strength through Jesus Christ and his love and power. God is good all the time. You, your family and friends have been in my prayers for the past several days and will continue to be. God bless.
If there are any kids reading this.......A Bully is a coward, self conscious person that can only feel good about who they are if they are making someone else feel bad. Keep telling someone that you are being bullied until you find someone that will help you. They are not worth taking your own life.
Ok for one!!!!! Sir i am sorry for your lost and second help your son by finding the people that bullied him!!! Your son loves you!!!! He is now in a much safer place im sorry that you have to go through this may your son rest in heavenly peace
I am glad that more and more people are coming out against bullying because enough is enough and we need more people to speak up against bullying. Bullying takes a huge toll on the individuals life who is being bullied and makes them feel wothless and that is just pure crap. I am dealing with a friend's son who is being bullied and it is not good the only thing is he has not mentioned hurting himself or killing himself and we watch him closely.
It is my understanding that this father is divorced and live some 2 hours away from his son. Children, especially in todays world, need supportive parents and actively involved parents. Maybe the father should look in the mirror and ask himself if he was as good as father as was possible. Was living 2 hours away necessary and was it helpful to his son and their relationship. If he lived in the same house or lived very close by could he have been a better protector of his son. I do not like that he will blame the bully, blame the school and blame society, but mot take any responsibility for his own actions and choices.
I am not excusing bullying. It is wrong. With that said, parents are the first line of defense in helping children cope, but parents are often off doing their own thing and are not readily available to help theirr kids day in and day out. I really believe that this lesson should be impressed upon mothers and fathers all across the US.
cjc.. i personally know this man. he was an outstanding father that has done and cared more for jordan more than most. im not going to start pointing fingers at those that are far more to blame then him, but mr lewis is not the one. how dare u sit and disgrace this man in such a difficult time in his life. certain situations in life cause divorce. if u look into it 50 percent of marraiges now adays end in divorce. its unfortunate that mr lewis has not lived the perfect life that u have. if u have children u will soon find out that always knowing whats going on in your teen agers mind is impossible.unless they are perfect like u are. do u realize that he didnt move from his child that his ex wife did. unless u have ever lost someone close to suicide u wont understand, then again everyone u associate with is perfect. u should take your negative attitude and use it for good. you will gain more
respect. Your a f'n idiot.
Obviously u have no idea what you are talking about. This man is a great father and cared so much for his kids! He did reach out to his son if u have been paying attention, when his son talked to him a month and a half ago. For that matter if you listen Brad Lewis did not blame any one and even stated he wasn't pointing fingers! But his son did state in his suicide note that he was doing this because of being BULLIED! Another thing if you have ever been around teenagers or remember being one urself a lot of them don't like their parents getting involved in their lives at that age! This boy did report problems to the school the school did nothing and are stating that they had no idea. Police should of did a better job doing the wellness check the night before should of reported it to the crisis center but didn't!! How dare you blame and point fingers at this man! Did u ever think that this man lived where he lived so that he could keep the job he has to be able to support his child!! You should just learn to keep your mouth closed when you know nothing.
Don't be afraid to teach your children to stand up for themselves. This psychological conditioning will not work, were Americans.